Yes I Am.....No I'm Not

 I once read that artist's brains more closely resemble the brains schizophrenics than the brains of "ordinary" people's. I've been through it lately. I've vacillated between "everything is falling apart, I'll never dig out of this hole" and " ultimate success is just around the corner, all my hard work is about to pay off". I suppose that both of these are at least partly true. I've been told all my life that I think too much. That's probably true too. I think that my biggest problem of late has been not enough time in my studio creating. When I stay busy I don't dwell on things as much. I thought of all this because I started on a t-shirt last night. A face airbrushed over a paint splattered shirt. It looked awful. I was pissed that I ruined a shirt. I had a last second idea to use white paint to undo some of the black that had gone way past where I needed it. I came in to my studio this morning and looked at it with fresh eyes. The eyes that I worked on to salvage looked great. If I can do as much with the lips as I did with the eyes it should turn out to be a fantastic shirt. I may even use this technique on purpose next time.

"My First Self Portrait"

age 5

I Actually Have A Giant Ego

 I've had a great week so far. I've accomplished more the past two days than I normally get done in a whole week. It's a great feeling. I've also got an extra day off this week. I really can't afford it, but then I can't really ever afford to take a day off. I try to balance cash and sanity. My airbrush is cleaned and back together. It was over a week before I got it back together. I ended up having to have my wife help me, because for some reason it took three hands. I love to airbrush, but they're so high maintenance. I prefer an old fashioned brush. Swish it in some water and wipe it dry. I've also done some work on my website, DougBaltz.com . It's not quite where I want it to be, but it looks much better than it did. I've had trouble getting my site to do what I need it to do. I certainly can't afford to hire someone to make and maintain it. It is becoming another skill I've taught myself. I can't decide if I have a brilliant teacher or a fantastic student. I've also made plenty of time to paint. After all, it is what I was put here to do.

"Frisco"

   I was looking through my portfolio yesterday, picking out paintings to post. I was looking at all the acrylics I've done over the years. There were quite a few I had forgotten about. I gotta tell you, I'm very proud of the artwork I've produced.

Styles Change

  I've been flipping through my digital portfolio the past few days. I sometimes forget how much my style has changed over these past years. I remember thinking that when I painted this:

"The Eyes of Age"

that I would never paint anything better.  Then I painted this:

"Karen"

and I thought that I had moved the bar up. I think this is a prime example of my style at this point in my career. There are some people, quite a few actually, that think this is the summit:

"Art's Grandpa"

  I enjoyed these paintings and still return to this style from time to time. I've headed more to the abstract as of late, blurring the line between realism and abstraction:

"Soulful"

  This one is good. I really like it a lot. I've decided that, in my opinion, this is the one that seems to be the best example of what I'm looking to create lately:

 

"Faraway Eyes"

 It's not really abstract, or realistic, and it's got elements of painting and drawing in it. It's what sets my art apart from the rest of the world. It's what keeps my art from being pigeon holed. I suspect it also keeps my art from being sold in the main stream. I suppose that would really annoy me if I was more concerned with money than creating spectacular artwork.